Bit more pilot humor

Discussion in 'Hangar Flying' started by orion, Aug 12, 2005.

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  1. Aug 12, 2005 #1

    orion

    orion

    orion

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    This was forwrded to me - I thought Jake might use it as background information for his training:

    Naval Aviator:

    On a carrier, the Naval Aviator looks over at the Catapult Officer
    ("Shooter") who gives the run up engines signal by rotating his finger above his head.. The pilot pushes the throttle forward, verifies all flight
    controls are operational, checks all gauges, and gives the Cat officer a
    brisk salute, continuing the Navy / Marine tradition of asking permission to leave the ship. The Cat officer drops to one knee while swooping his arm forward and pointing down deck, granting that permission. The pilot is immediately catapulted and becomes airborne.

    Air Force Pilot :

    We've all seen Air Force pilots at the air force base look up just before
    taxiing for takeoff and the ground crew waits until the pilot's thumb is
    sticking straight up. The crew chief then confirms that he sees the thumb, salutes, and the Air Force pilot then takes off. This time-tested tradition is the last link in the Air Force safety net to confirm that the pilot does not have his thumb up his ass.

    Army Aviator:

    If you've ever seen an Army helicopter pilot preparing for takeoff, you will note that the pilot gives the ground guy a thumbs up before he is given hover and takeoff signals. There are two theories about the origin of this gesture. One is that it is to show that the pilot has identified which of his fingers is the thumb so that he will be able to properly operate his
    controls. The most compelling theory says that this is to show the ground crewman that the pilot indeed knows which direction is up.
     
  2. Aug 12, 2005 #2

    Chester

    Chester

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    It just goes to show you who the better pilots are. ANYONE, including just GA guys, can land on a fixed runway, but it takes a NAVY and a Marine pilot to land on a moving runway.

    OH YEAH!!!! :gig:
     
  3. Sep 23, 2005 #3

    pylon500

    pylon500

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    C'mon Jman, Tell 'em you don't NEED a runway!!:ban:
    Arthur.
     
  4. Sep 26, 2005 #4

    Rhino

    Rhino

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    I don't need a moving one.
     
  5. Sep 26, 2005 #5

    Jman

    Jman

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    Runways are a crutch! :gig:

    -------------------

    You've heard the Navy fixed wing pilot’s prayer haven’t you?

    Dear Lord,

    Please give me the eyes of an Eagle
    Reaction time of a Viper
    And most of all the &alls of an Army Helicopter Pilot!

    -Amen-

    -------------------

    Of course, the Navy Pilot would probably reply with:

    Do you know why most Army helicopters have side by side seating?
    So they can hold hands when they’re scared!

    So why doesn’t the Apache have side by side seating?
    Because in the case of Apache pilots, holding hands may lead to something much more intimate.

    Or, the all to true question:

    In a crowed room, how can you tell who the Apache pilot is?
    Don't worry, give it 2 minutes and he'll tell you.
     
  6. Sep 28, 2005 #6

    Craig

    Craig

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    Question for Jake

    Jake -

    The world wants to know -

    Is it true that the only reason that helicopters fly is because they vibrate so much that the earth rejects them?
     
  7. Sep 28, 2005 #7

    Nozzlejocky

    Nozzlejocky

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    Some very interesting ways to look at military flight prep!:gig:
     
  8. Sep 29, 2005 #8

    Falco Rob

    Falco Rob

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    "Is it true that the only reason that helicopters fly is because they vibrate so much that the earth rejects them?"


    The way I heard it was the earth rejected them because they were so bloody ugly.
     
  9. Sep 29, 2005 #9

    Rhino

    Rhino

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    Or, "Helicopters don't fly. They beat the air into submission."
     

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